Sunday, January 30, 2011

Sunshine in the Dark

This New Year has brought with it a mix of emotions; a new hope, a breath of air, a ray of sunshine. I miss my sweetheart, though somehow I feel comforted; most days anyway. Everyday I convince myself that he really is gone, that I have to learn to live again, and learn to smile once more.

I never imagined a world without him, and since he left, my life hasn't been the same. Who's going to finish my sentences and read my thoughts? Who's going to bring me coffee in the mornings or take care of me when I'm sick? Who's going to make me laugh when I'm sad or make me cry with a birthday card? Who's going to hug me while I'm doing the dishes or give me morning kisses? Who's going to motivate me to continue writing or listen to my new song?

His nurturing love was priceless. His contagious laugh was unforgettable. His old soul was unique. I shall never forget him or the way he made me feel, truly loved.

This New Year I dedicate it to him. I vow to remember who he was as a human being and as my best friend. I vow to do what I must do to continue the fight and learn to live with purpose. I vow to allow God to continue doing what He does best, make miracles. Because it's going to take a miracle to heal from this one.

I want to thank each one of you who have kept in touch this past year, who have taken a moment from busy schedules to let me know you care. Thank you for your sweet words and cyber hugs. I want to thank my family and friends for encouraging me, for crying with me and for reminding me that I'm still needed here. I want to thank my Daddy, God, for staying close to me, holding my hand and gently leading me out of the dark.

God bless you all dearly,


PS. If I should sound morbid at any given time, please remind me of my vows.