Insomnia

Ever so often you can't sleep, thinking upon the things you didn't accomplish throughout the day. You know? the little things that lead to bigger questions. You ask yourself, ' Was I productive enough?' 'Did I accomplish my goals for the day?' 'Am I headed in the right direction?'

Insomnia... It keeps me up at night. It doesn't wonder if I've I slept enough or ask if it's time to sleep. I've often wondered if I started counting the sheep that so many others count, will I too fall asleep?

What is it that keeps us up at night? Could it be that darkness is much quieter than daylight? Is it that we think deeper at night? Pondering on one of the items we forgot to check off on our to-do-lists. Or could it be something greater... something deeper... something that gnaws at you, creating an abyss of questions, and leaving you longing for something more!

The gifts which have been bestowed upon us that we've buried in time.The death of a loved one whom we never told 'goodbye'. The endless invites of family weddings and picnics you never attended. The long distance between you and those you'd love to be with.

Thinking back on the things we wanted to do years ago, but were too afraid to do them. And now... Well now, is it too late to even try?

So what really keeps us awake at night? Is it the dirty dishes in the sink or the dirty dishes in our mind? Though, the dishes in the sink can be easily washed and put away. But is it as easy to wash the dirty dishes in our mind? The 'could have, should have, would have' statements that we casually repeat time and time again to excuse the things we didn't do in life. Not because we couldn't, but because we allowed so many things to get in the way. Fear. Procrastination. Lethargy.

And now? Where am I now? Where are you now?

There is still time right? Didn't Warren Zevon say it best?... 'I'll sleep when I'm dead.'

When you can't sleep and find yourself wondering why your life didn't go as you planned. Why you never finished writing that book or playing that instrument or singing that song or travelling the world or falling in love or washing those dishes... Just remember these words; As long as you have a beating heart, breath in your lungs, and the strength of a lion; or a lamb...

                                                             There is still time!

'My mission in life is not merely to survive but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor and some style.'  Maya Angelo



Copyright ©July 2016 Ellie Kings
All Rights Reserved.
Sleeping woman painting -Pinterest

A Prayer at 3

At three in the morning, I'm awake while the rest of the world sleeps.  And at this hour, I  think not of myself but of others; others who might also be awake with me, who might need a prayer at 3.

• The woman on her way home from a long night out...struggling to get the key in her car, and  suddenly is raped by the faceless man
• The child that's locked in his closet trying not to hear his parents' screams again... more bruises than words
• The father sneaking into his little girl's bedroom not to kiss her goodnight but to take advantage of her sweet innocence
• The reformed alcoholic that's desparately trying not to have that 'one' drink
• The brave soldiers that are attacked at night by yet another devious enemy
• The country that sleeps through another night, not of a sudden economy crash, but of a ten decade famine 

These are some of the ugly stories of our wicked world, not only at 3am but at any given time.  The truths that we somehow deny or sweep under the rug, or hide in the skeleton closet.  These are the little things that no one dare speak of.  These are the cares of the world, but not of our world.  No... our world is perfect... filled with empty promises, misguided dillusions, and white lies...  the smile-painted faces we show our neighbors, the blind eyes that show no sign of remorse.

I invite you to share a moment of prayer for those who have a more distressed life than our own.  We are in the end (rather beginning) brothers and sisters.  So when you can't sleep at night and wonder about your own life and your own troubles, do yourself a favor, think of someone else's troubles and intercede for them with just a simple prayer of love.